The last couple of months have been hectic, hard, heavy. Lots of plates spinning, and most of the time it feels like none of them are spinning particularly well. But as we close out one year and head for another, I'm getting predictably contemplative, and I'm working hard to choose joy, to relish the moments that matter, to let go of the rest.
Husband is finishing up his final work trip of the year, so it was just me and the kiddos for four days. It was testing and exhausting, but more importantly, when I got out of my own way, it was simple and awesome and just what the doctor ordered.
I had grand visions of loading them up and taking them to Zoo Lights or to the Disney themed holiday exhibit at the Museum of Science & Industry. Those things would have been lovely, I'm sure, but in the end, I wasn't up for it, and we kept things simple.
A trip to Barnes & Noble for holiday book perusing and a little action at the lego table. Walks to Starbucks and throughout our neighborhood to find the best lights and decorations -- we branded them "twinkle walks." Time on the swings and the slides when the temps neared forty during a Chicago December. Puzzles and books and blocks on the floor. Cookie baking, newfound crawling skills, pulling up, singing, dance parties, and a million rounds of pull the ornaments off our tree and put them back again. Sure, there were also tantrums and tears and moments of frayed nerves and lost patience, but when I reflect on the weekend in full, I like to think the fun outweighed the not.
Tonight, I bundled them into the stroller for one final twinkle walk, fed them dinner and let them FaceTime with Nana, Grandad, and Uncle Matt while they ate. We survived the double bath/jammies/teeth brushing routine and cuddled up on the floor of Rowan's room to read ten books in rapid succession. We said our prayer, sang our three-song bedtime line-up and I snuggled each of them into their cribs with wishes for sweet dreams and peaceful slumber.
There's a lot I don't know at this particular life juncture, but I do know this: those little people sleeping upstairs make me the luckiest.
In spite of the crazy, I adore this time of year.